Gettin’ real…

*Trigger Warning- I’ll be talking about my body, mental health and insecurities. If these could possibly trigger a bad feeling or set you back on your mental health journey, please skip this post. I’ll be back next week with (FINALLY) a post about the house.*

This is me at what I would consider my best shape. My body did whatever I wanted it to. I was hitting PR’s, and I couldn’t walk past a mirror without flexing and LOVING what I saw. My body was transforming, and so was my mind. I was kicking the former “Michele’s” ass and taking names. I was at the gym 4 times a week, and I never missed a Monday. And then one day, everything came tumbling down. Depression set in and I hated stepping foot in the gym. I was hitting a plateau (something I was warned would happen) and I started second guessing myself. I would just sit and cry and I never fully understood why. A dark cloud hung over me, and I couldn’t explain what was happening. Family would tell me I had so much to be thankful for, and I needed to see that. *FYI* WORST thing to say to someone that is suffering from depression. We aren’t ungrateful, we are lost. I started slacking at the gym and eventually decided, maybe I just needed time away. I was burned out and needed a break. Well that was 10 months ago, and I’ve only been back to a gym maybe 15 times. I am nowhere near where I used to be, and I HATE what I see in the mirror. Kyle and I went to Braves Opening Day and I cropped our first Opening Day photo (2011) next to this one and I was horrified. I didn’t even look like me. It’s not that I’m fat. I have fat without a doubt, but it’s that I’m just not “me” anymore. I have always been athletic and when I looked at myself, I knew I could do anything. I could lift anything. I could run without issue. But this week, I ran on Monday afternoon and my hips STILL hurt. I’ve let myself go, and I am so disappointed. I see people that used to work out with me and would ask ME for advice, and they are now KILLING it in the gym. I am so incredibly proud of them, but I can’t help but be jealous. I feel uncomfortable and insecure in the gym. Yeah, my belly is (mostly) flat, but I can barely squat what I used to warm up with. My traps are nearly gone, and the only reason my shoulders still exist is because I was blessed with them genetically. I have no one to blame for this backslide but myself. I’m not posting this because I want pity or someone to tell me I look great! Because it honestly has nothing to do with anyone else. Kyle tells me daily how beautiful I am and how much he loves my body, and I am so appreciative of that. But I don’t see it, and I need to change that. I’m putting this here for accountability. I found a local old-school gym that I want to try out. Their prices are reasonable and they have great reviews. I’m determined to get back to the mental and physical state that I was. I want to bust out of my jeans because my quads are jacked. I want to need new t-shirts because my arms don’t fit. I have my goals, and I WILL reach them. No more excuses.

Thanks for listening to me whine.

Poppin’ in to say hello

Here is a little sneak peek of one of our pieces we decided to hang. (It was Kyle’s idea. I give him all the credit.) Obviously it’s not a typical piece, and some might consider it tacky. But those people are sad and lame and square, and we choose not to associate ourselves with that negativity. Buh bye. Go be a Nats fan.

So Easter is this weekend and we are hosting. I am super duper excited to be able to have family over to our new digs. It’s going to be great. But I tell you what, finals are sneaking their happy little asses up SO fast, and I don’t know if I can keep up. I’m kind of freaking out. *Smiling and sweating emoji* I have 4 papers due and a project, and that is all in addition to my finals. SO I am attempting to cram all that in between classes and trying to put Ikea furniture together so our bedrooms aren’t empty.

On a side note, if you are considering marrying someone, put a piece of Ikea furniture together first. If no one is murdered before the final product, you have found yourself a life partner.

Anyyywayyyssss, overall, life is still pretty grand over here. We have been working on a couple decorating projects that I’m excited to share on here soon. Nothing grand. I wish, but I’m pretty pathetic when it comes to arts and crafts. I get distracted too easily. So set your expectations really low so we can all be pleasantly surprised.

On another side note, my grandfather gave me this piece of advice when I was younger and it always stuck with me.

“When it comes to dealing with other people, never have any expectations, then you will never be disappointed.”

It’s kind of sad, and yet oh so true.

Ok, y’all! I just wanted to pop in between classes and giant cups of coffee and see how you’re doing.

Hope all is well on the western front! (And eastern)(and northern and southern) (ya know, all the fronts)

Our little watchdog, protecting us from the neighbor’s miniature poodle.

Spring has sprung!

And that means it’s baseball season! My favorite time of the year! We were able to go to the Braves preseason game against the Yankees, and Suntrust Park is absolutely beautiful. I can honestly say they did amazing work at this park, and I am so excited to see it fully completed. Baseball is my JAM, and I am so lucky that I found a husband that loves it as much as I do.

So, I feel like this week just started and it’s already Thursday. Is this what people were talking about when they said things like, “Just wait until you’re older. Time flies?” Because I never doubted the truth in that. I just thought that it would take a little longer for me to notice. Like I would have kids and stuff before I was begging time to slow TF down. I don’t want to have this post be about time flying by and all that stuff because that’s stressful. And honestly I’m feeling really chill right now, so let’s keep that movement flowing.

So today the cable guy is coming and getting everything hooked up the way the first guy was SUPPOSED to do it. So *fingers crossed* we will have internet and cable soon, and I will be able to resume binge watching all my shows.

Also, HHgregg is bringing our replacement dryer since the first one they delivered burned up. Literally. Sparks and all. It was lovely. Luckily we were home, and the breaker did its job and shut off power to the dryer. They tried everything possible to blame it on us. But jokes on them because I used to work in the electrical business and I may not know a ton, but I know enough to be dangerous. And defend myself. So they are delivering a new dryer tomorrow (UPDATE apparently the “inclement weather” has affected our delivery time and they can’t deliver until Saturday. I will NEVER be purchasing from this company ever again. It has been a complete nightmare.) and I will FINALLY be able to do laundry after two (very long) weeks. Is it bad that I’m excited to fold laundry and watch This is Us?

On another note, spring classes are almost over, and I am so ready for finals and the end of this semester. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE school (super nerd for life). I could be a lifelong student. But chemistry is killing me, and I recently found out that by the time I am able to apply for my grad program, they will no longer be accepting that prereq. So I am in a class I despise for no reason. And I have to work my butt off to maintain my current GPA. So I will be taking summer Chem, which consists of 6 hour classes twice a week, to make up for these wasted 4 credit hours.  But that’s ok! Because that will keep me on the learning train and make me reach my goals a little faster. Positive thoughts right?! RIGHT?!

Back to zen.

Once we get the internet up and running, I will have a post up with pictures of the new house! It will take a minute and I am currently posting while at school whenever I can find time before or after class. So unfortunately I can’t do it now.

Our backyard during some of the rainstorms.

The weather was NO JOKE yesterday in and around Atlanta. I was getting flood warnings and tornado warnings out the WAZOOO. But once I got home, I just couldn’t get over how beautiful the rain was hanging in all the trees and the heavy fog. Y’all it was too much. I was snapping pictures of the trees like I was a prom photographer. “Oooh yes girl. Pop the limb. Long necks now.” Anyways, it was gorgeous, and our little trickle creek got some much needed rain. So it is flowing like a big daddy now.

We are having our families out for Easter next weekend, and we are super excited to be hosting our first holiday in our new house. What do y’all have planned for Easter weekend? Binging on discounted candy from Kroger? Me too. Don’t you touch my Reese’s eggs.

I hope y’all have a FABULOUS afternoon and weekend!

Slowly but surely back to a routine.

Our new backyard

Y’all, I’m seriously the worst. And I’m not going to sit here and tell you how busy I am, because really, who the hell isn’t? Right? Waaah waaah cry about it aaaand…. Let’s move on.

I really like when bloggers act like they are talking over drinks or coffee and sharing stuff face to face. So that’s how this will go. I have a (rather large) glass of champagne, because it 3 in the afternoon and I’m an adult so I’m allowed to have it. What are you having? A mimosa? A glass of champagne with me? Maybe just a glass of water because holy balls this Georgia weather ain’t playin!! Which I’m not complaining about because I’ll take 83 over 38 ANY day!

Anyways, tell me about your week. We are ALMOST to the weekend! What have you been up to?  What are you reading? Any good shows?

Our new front door!

I’m reading this book (I’ve actually been slowly reading this over the past 6 months but I am finally forcing myself to step away from the damn phone and read the freaking book) and watching this show  on demand. Well, attempting to. We still haven’t had the cable and internet (I’m posting at school) set up at the new house. (YES! We got it. I’ll have a post with more pictures up soon. Not with furniture though. I’m not Joanna Gaines. She’s an angel from heaven.) We had Comcast come out and it was one of the worst experiences I’ve had with a technician. He complained the entire time, huffed and puffed, rubbed his face like I was asking him to install gold plated coax cable up his butt…. After what I thought might lead to him hyperventilating because of his rapid, annoyed breathing, he told me that he’s going to have to drill holes in our hardwood floors and have cable running in these grates and across our exterior brick walls in potentially in windows. ABSOLUTELY NOT, buh bye dude. So we will find someone else to do it.

Starting to feel the champagne do its thang.

How is the husband, wife, partner, kid, furkid, roommate, empty house? Any pointers on how to make a house less creepy at night without installing spotlights in every corner? Or the best polish for hardwoods? Or maybe just how in the world you get rid of that stale, empty house smell quicker than just living in it for a long time and burning enough candles to warm a village?

We’ve been looking into getting Georgia a brother or sister. Now that we have a yard, we think it’s only fair to get her a playmate. She’s just so spoiled; we don’t know how she will react to losing her only child status. Any pointers on that? Introducing a new pup to the king/queen of the castle?

How’s your glass? Need a refill?

So we found this blueberry cheesecake ice cream at Kroger. It was on sale so we thought, “It would be irresponsible if we DIDN’T buy it. We must!” So we did and holy moly it’s fabulous!! No regrets. Except our cruise leaves in 6 weeks and a tub of ice cream doesn’t really make me go, “hell yeah! Swimsuits!” I was going to say, swimsuit ready, but honestly what does that even mean? I think being born essentially made me and anyone else swimsuit ready. We were already flopping around in our own little private pool before that. I think we are all pretty set on that front.

Do you have any amazing summer recipes you would like to share? I need some forreal.

I will forever love this pasta salad. Seriously. This pasta salad is one of the best I’ve ever eaten. It can be added over top of a salad and tossed (because who doesn’t love salad over salad? Egg salad over romaine FTW!). It’s also delicious with some crispy grilled chicken. It’s refreshing and filling and I can’t sing its praises enough.

The champagne has my eyelids getting heavy and I’m ready for a nap. After I unpack and do dishes and a billion other things. But that’s ok because there is always tomorrow.

Bye y’all!

It’s been an entire month!

Y’all, I feel like the laziest, busy person in the entire world. I feel like I’m constantly going and going and going and nothing gets done. I finally stopped and asked myself, “What the hell are you busy doing?” Then it hit me; my time management SUCKS. I can honestly say there are times that the anxiety gets the best of me, and I’m so exhausted that I can barely function. However, the majority of the time I convinced myself that I should take a 30 minute break to have a snack and watch TV. 30 minutes NEVER stops at 30 minutes. In fact, I have been watching This is Us (Is anyone else watching this?! Will I ever get through an episode without crying?!), and they are 45 minute episodes, so I already set myself up for failure.

So now I have identified the issue. Does anyone have any suggestions for fixing it other than, “Get off your butt and do what you need to do!”

This month and next month has and will be crazy. We ended up having to back out of our house. We were in our due diligence period, and it was foolish of me to assume the house was ours. There were some foundation issues that would end up costing us significantly more than we could handle. So we ended up having to back out. We were devastated, but you live and you learn.

Here are a couple photos of this past month. Hopefully I can get my shit straight and get back on my posting routine.

We got a new car to replace my Patriot. We got another Patriot. I like consistency. 🙂
This is the view outside the back of the house we have moved on to. We haven’t officially closed yet. *Fingers crossed*

What have y’all been up to this past month?!